How to ask my therapist for slide scale without offending her. She's in a tight spot because of COVID-19?
Therapy is a journey, and your therapist your co-passenger. A lot of people who go to therapy wonder about their therapist – What they do in their free time? How they cope with a stressful situation? What they think of them? or How are they handling COVID-19?
COVID-19 has given us a set of collective unique stressors that none of us are prepared to handle, this range from complexities in relationships, work and finances. It is common for people to make assumptions on how their therapists are coping with a situation and feel about them. This part of therapy is called transference, where a person unconsciously directs feelings of one person onto another person. (This happens outside therapy too!). Transference is an integral part of therapy, when observed and talked about it aids in identifying the unhealed wounds that can be attended to.
My guess is that the worry about asking your therapist to consider lowering your session fee is burdening you because of your own stresses with money (especially during these times).While I understand you are trying to “take care” of your therapist interest, I feel you are trying to take care of your own interest (financially and therapeutic relationship). We often feel that when we talk about our problems we are”dumping” them on someone else. But in reality reaching out, on a trig erring topic, can lead be a healthy conversation too!
It would be good to take this to your therapist, and discuss it with them, your thoughts and perspective on changing the session fee during the pandemic. Instead of worrying for them, a conversation based on how you feel would be most beneficial to your therapeutic relationship. As therapists, we are trained to constantly assess whether we are able to work with our clients and address their concerns as required, we do this with our supervision work and personal therapy.
Nothing lasts forever, not even pandemics but what this time does is give us time to deeply understand and care about those around us. But remember, hiding behind the mask of caring for others takes away your need to first take care of yourself – even if it means discussing wit your counseling fee with your therapist.
She believes emotional and mental health care are at the very core of us experiencing happiness in our life. Her qualifications include a Masters in Clinical Psychology and in Counselling and Psychotherapy. Priyanka enjoys working with young adults and understanding life as it changes with intrusions like the internet and the pandemic. Above everything else her true love is homemade chocolate cake.