I’ve always liked women in a way that I liked men but I’ve never been able to say it out aloud because of the obvious reason – “what would people say?”
My relationship with men has always been a bit of a problem because it would never end up working out. My exes thought that my sexuality seemed ‘fishy’ and would end up breaking up with me because they would presume that I’m a lesbian. I ended up doubting my sexuality for the next seven years.
I would decide not to constantly think about it but that would never happen. I came to the realisation that the way I used to feel about men was how I felt about women too.
In my first year of college, I started to embrace who I was with the help of my friends. You can say that I became more self-aware in the process. But there was always that one question that never really went away – “do I really like women the same way I like men?”
After a lot of internal debates and multiple bouts of reflection, I came to peace with the fact that I’m bisexual. Soon after, I started seeing a boy who was perfect for me and I was overjoyed because I’d finally met my soulmate. Not only did he support all my decisions, but we also shared very similar opinions on a lot of things in the world, from feminism to homosexuality.
A year into our relationship, I finally told him I’m bisexual. Surprisingly, he didn’t react oddly at all. He told me he knew that no matter what, he’ll always be my person and that would never change. He knew that it wasn’t about picking sides, but it was about picking a person and that person was him.
I’ve realised that it’s very important to have someone who’ll support you and celebrate the queerness in you. That person can be yourself too. All you need to do is accept yourself.